Dr. Cooper was right. It is overwhelming trying to learn everything. I want so badly to love these students well, but I need to know their names. Today as I was sitting in the back observing I noticed one of the guys was sort of withdrawn. Now, naturally this could be part of his personality, but there was something in his eyes when he turned around. I just felt like he was hurting so badly somewhere really deep inside.
I keep thinking of some of the teenagers I’ve come in contact with over the past few years and the deep hurts they’ve shared with me over the years. Verbally abusive parents, living in the shadow of their siblings, sex-obsessed classmates, the lure of drinking, the pressure to look like they have it all together. They have deep, deep, deep pain. And often times it’s buried so far down they can’t bear to share it.
When the world was hurting deep down and in great pain, God himself came and dwelt among humanity. He allowed them, in the words of Hule Goddard, to get their grubby hands on Him. He came and he lived and he loved. He was Love itself, breathing and living life alongside of them.
I don’t know a lot about lesson plans or schedules or giving tests. I have so much to learn about discipline and how to handle problems in the classroom. My methods will be stale and there will be questions I have no idea how to answer. I will be foolish and make dumb mistakes as I start this journey of teaching.
I am not God. I am not perfect. I do not live in a high and holy place. But in order to love these students well, I must be present with them. I must dwell with them, live life with them. I must do whatever it takes to communicate the truth that my heart is for them and God’s heart is for them.
I need His help to do this well. Will you join me in praying that grace upon grace would be extended as I seek to be an incarnate minister of the gospel?